il0vey0u*

Sunday, July 04, 2004

...

he's out from ns yest(sat)..i know it from his fren...i noe he hav seen those sms i sent him when he juz went into army..i sent him another on sat, asking him how he is..yet i received no reply..is it tt he dun wan to reply mi..or wad? i duno..i cried..i duno y..i should b used to him not replying..coz tis 2yrs plus..there's hot n cold periods btw mi n him..during cold periods..he did not reply ani of my sms..n i m used to it..i would juz take it as another of e cold period..bt duno y..tis time..when he din reply..i juz feel so sad..so down..y?

his fren ask mi whether he replied..i said no..n his fren said tt porbably he aint serious..i wanted to reply his fren "mayb ba"..bt i actualli sent to to him!den my hp beeps..n i saw his name..he wrote"i tink u send wrongly.."..i was feeling happy tat i send wrongly..coz he replied..den i asked"how r u?" i was waiting for his reply..oni to c tt "doing fine..wit my gf now." gf? he had a gf?tat word gf struck mi badly..gf..tears sarted falling incessantly..y?is tt really e truth?y after asking mi twice if he still has chance..y after giving mi all e hope..been waiting for 2yr plus for him..it all amounted to nth bt more pain..i dunwan to go back to e time when we broke up..i dunwan to cry like how i used to..i dunwan to force out a smile n pretend tt everiting's alrite when they arent..its all too much for mi to take..

hold my hands tight and we will make it through...